The afternoon sun beat down mercilessly on the students as they swarmed out of the school compound. They were eager to head home after a long day in school. John and Peter were no exception. John, in particular, was eager to go home to play on his computer games.
John walked his bicycle to the busy section of the road with Peter. At the junction where they would part, John decided to dash across the road.
“I'm going to cycle swiftly across. Saving more time to play games,” John muttered a matter-of-factly.
“No, it is very dangerous,” Peter objected to the idea immediately.
John ignored Peter and pedalled across the road. Unbeknownst to him, his decision cost him dearly. At that juncture, a car was speeding towards John. The driver was talking on the phone and looked sleepy.
Amidst all the distractions, the motorist failed to notice John. His sedan was heading for a direct-course collision with John's bicycle.
There was an earth-shattering boom as metal and flesh collided. John was flung through the air like a rag doll and landed in a heap. As the driver realized the gravity of the situation, he hesitantly got out of his car and walked gingerly towards the lifeless boy.
Peter now stood speechless on the spot as the surreal scene of the driver carrying his friend frantically into the car. His soul was jolted out of his skin for a few seconds.
“Faster! Help John to your car and drive him to the hospital!” Peter shouted as he raced to help his unconscious friend.
“Oh, yes!” The driver responded.
“It’s my fault! I should have warned him that he should not just dash across the road. No, it’s not my fault! I told him that but he just turned a deaf ear,” thousands of thoughts flashed through Peter's confused mind as he looked at Peter, face ashen white.
Out of the blue, the message tone of John’s mobile phone sounded. Peter searched for John's bag for his mobile phone .
As Peter read the message, tears rolled down his cheeks.
The message read, “Remember to be careful while cycling across the road. Love mum :) ”
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
CW: Qi Jian's Writing (unedited)
Never had I expected to be a witness in an accident. At the
thought of jaywalking, adrenaline coursed through every vein in my body
and I vowed I would not jaywalk and would use the pedestrian crossing.
One day, our family decided to go home after shopping for one hour in the Hougang Shopping Center.
Just when we reached the exit, I saw a driver’s car swerving
from lane to lane recklessly. The Red Honda car was cruising at a speed of
120km/h.
In front of his car was a bicycle with a man riding on it.
“
Oh no! Something bad is going to happen!” I gasped and my
whole face turned pale.
The driver of the car honked loudly and angrily at the cyclist.
The driver quickly jammed on the brakes but it was too late.
The cyclist was flung against the car’s bonnet and with a loud
thud, he landed on the road. Lying in a sprawl, legs and arms in a contorted
position. His ankles had been violently rotated to the side. Blood was oozing
out from the cyclist’s knee. His face was pale and was smeared with blood.
The errant driver came out of his car and took away the victim’s wallet.
With a screech, he took off.
“How could he do that! He is inhuman!” I cursed him
“I wish he can experience the same accident as that victim,” I cursed him again.
While I was cursing him, the witness of the accident fished out their handphones and dialed for the ambulance and the police. Within minutes, the
sirens of the ambulance reverberated through the air. The paramedics carried the victim onto the stretcher and darted off.
After the ambulance had let, what remained on the road were spots of blood and broken shards of glass.
“If you do not want to involved in any road accident, you need to be extra careful and do not jaywalk or else your ending will be the same as that
victim or even worse,” my mother warned me
thought of jaywalking, adrenaline coursed through every vein in my body
and I vowed I would not jaywalk and would use the pedestrian crossing.
One day, our family decided to go home after shopping for one hour in the Hougang Shopping Center.
Just when we reached the exit, I saw a driver’s car swerving
from lane to lane recklessly. The Red Honda car was cruising at a speed of
120km/h.
In front of his car was a bicycle with a man riding on it.
“
Oh no! Something bad is going to happen!” I gasped and my
whole face turned pale.
The driver of the car honked loudly and angrily at the cyclist.
The driver quickly jammed on the brakes but it was too late.
The cyclist was flung against the car’s bonnet and with a loud
thud, he landed on the road. Lying in a sprawl, legs and arms in a contorted
position. His ankles had been violently rotated to the side. Blood was oozing
out from the cyclist’s knee. His face was pale and was smeared with blood.
The errant driver came out of his car and took away the victim’s wallet.
With a screech, he took off.
“How could he do that! He is inhuman!” I cursed him
“I wish he can experience the same accident as that victim,” I cursed him again.
While I was cursing him, the witness of the accident fished out their handphones and dialed for the ambulance and the police. Within minutes, the
sirens of the ambulance reverberated through the air. The paramedics carried the victim onto the stretcher and darted off.
After the ambulance had let, what remained on the road were spots of blood and broken shards of glass.
“If you do not want to involved in any road accident, you need to be extra careful and do not jaywalk or else your ending will be the same as that
victim or even worse,” my mother warned me
CW: Nadiah's Writing (unedited)
That very incident taught me much. Only a little lacking of consideration threatened an innocent boy’s life. Come to think of it, I really felt like punching that reckless driver, for he did not think of others before him. Even though that incident had occurred about two days ago, it kept replaying in my mind, again and again. Without realizing it, I was swept into the venue where it all happened, the place where that horrifying incident unfolded by itself…
Trudging to the bus-stop, I gave out a heavy sigh. There were tons and tons of homework for me to complete and I was totally worn out. I just wished that the bus I needed to board to reach home would arrive as quickly as possible.
But, luck was not by my side. The bus did not arrive after more that five minutes.
At the corner of my eye, I caught sight of a blue car. It was speeding furiously and was zig-zagging its way.
“The driver might be drunk,” I whispered softly to myself.
By that time, everyone at the bus-stop had noticed the blue car. They were all holding their breath, as the blue car would bang into the black car right ahead of it, if the blue car did not reduce its speed. Everyone was preparing for the worst, but little did we know that the worse was yet to come…
Unexpectedly, a uniformed boy was riding on his bicycle charging swiftly across the road. At that moment, my heart started pounding rapidly and my fingers were tightly crossed. I prayed hard that nothing bad would happen to the boy, but, my prayer went unanswered.
The blue car was still accelerating ahead, while the young cyclist was also racing forward, totally oblivious of the ever speeding, oncoming blue car.
Right in front of my eyes, I saw the blue car screech to a halt, but, it was too late. The blue car was so fast that it could not stop in time to avoid hitting the uniformed boy.
In quick succession, a loud thud could be heard.
“Oh my God!” I exclaimed in disbelief, my mouth gasping in utter shock.
From my spot, I could see fresh, red blood trickle down the boy’s white knees profusely. Not only were the legs injured, his head, hand and face were also badly wounded. The boy’s uniform was soaked in blood and he was knocked into unconsciousness. The boy’s bicycle was terribly crushed by the great impact and was thrown a few meters away.
I dashed towards the unconscious boy as fast as my legs could carry me. I knelt down beside him and felt for pulse. I could still feel for his pulse, so, I decided to dial for the police and ambulance. I fumbled for my handphone and started punching ‘999’ and ‘995’.
As I waited for the ambulance and police to arrive, suddenly, the blue car which had knocked down the uniformed boy drove past me, leaving a trail of smoke behind. Quickly, I stood up and shouted hysterically and waved my hands frantically in the air for the blue car’s driver. He had knocked down a poor, innocent boy and did not even have the guts to check on the boy! How inhuman could this driver be? I was totally upset and frustrated and I could not suppress those feelings anymore.
I whipped my head around to the bus-stop. Not even a single soul was going to render their help to the poor boy.
All of them were either too shocked to react or just not bothered. I was the only one who was helping. First, it was the reckless driver, and now, it was the people at the bus-stop that were indifferent to the situation. Engulfed in total disappointment and frustration, I could not believe that such people could exist in this world.
Within fifteen minutes, the ambulance’s sirens were blaring away and the ambulance and police drove in. The ambulance placed the unconscious boy onto the stretcher and took the boy to the hospital.
As for me, I was questioned by the police officers. But, I went home with a learning point in my mind: Always put others before you, always be considerate to others and always help others in need.
Trudging to the bus-stop, I gave out a heavy sigh. There were tons and tons of homework for me to complete and I was totally worn out. I just wished that the bus I needed to board to reach home would arrive as quickly as possible.
But, luck was not by my side. The bus did not arrive after more that five minutes.
At the corner of my eye, I caught sight of a blue car. It was speeding furiously and was zig-zagging its way.
“The driver might be drunk,” I whispered softly to myself.
By that time, everyone at the bus-stop had noticed the blue car. They were all holding their breath, as the blue car would bang into the black car right ahead of it, if the blue car did not reduce its speed. Everyone was preparing for the worst, but little did we know that the worse was yet to come…
Unexpectedly, a uniformed boy was riding on his bicycle charging swiftly across the road. At that moment, my heart started pounding rapidly and my fingers were tightly crossed. I prayed hard that nothing bad would happen to the boy, but, my prayer went unanswered.
The blue car was still accelerating ahead, while the young cyclist was also racing forward, totally oblivious of the ever speeding, oncoming blue car.
Right in front of my eyes, I saw the blue car screech to a halt, but, it was too late. The blue car was so fast that it could not stop in time to avoid hitting the uniformed boy.
In quick succession, a loud thud could be heard.
“Oh my God!” I exclaimed in disbelief, my mouth gasping in utter shock.
From my spot, I could see fresh, red blood trickle down the boy’s white knees profusely. Not only were the legs injured, his head, hand and face were also badly wounded. The boy’s uniform was soaked in blood and he was knocked into unconsciousness. The boy’s bicycle was terribly crushed by the great impact and was thrown a few meters away.
I dashed towards the unconscious boy as fast as my legs could carry me. I knelt down beside him and felt for pulse. I could still feel for his pulse, so, I decided to dial for the police and ambulance. I fumbled for my handphone and started punching ‘999’ and ‘995’.
As I waited for the ambulance and police to arrive, suddenly, the blue car which had knocked down the uniformed boy drove past me, leaving a trail of smoke behind. Quickly, I stood up and shouted hysterically and waved my hands frantically in the air for the blue car’s driver. He had knocked down a poor, innocent boy and did not even have the guts to check on the boy! How inhuman could this driver be? I was totally upset and frustrated and I could not suppress those feelings anymore.
I whipped my head around to the bus-stop. Not even a single soul was going to render their help to the poor boy.
All of them were either too shocked to react or just not bothered. I was the only one who was helping. First, it was the reckless driver, and now, it was the people at the bus-stop that were indifferent to the situation. Engulfed in total disappointment and frustration, I could not believe that such people could exist in this world.
Within fifteen minutes, the ambulance’s sirens were blaring away and the ambulance and police drove in. The ambulance placed the unconscious boy onto the stretcher and took the boy to the hospital.
As for me, I was questioned by the police officers. But, I went home with a learning point in my mind: Always put others before you, always be considerate to others and always help others in need.
CW: Edrick's Writing (unedited)
My whole family was having a dinner in a crowded coffee shop. While my parents were ordering food, I noticed that a man was standing very close to a woman and acting suspiciously. From where I was, I saw the man’s hand in the woman’s handbag. I was shocked. Thoughts raced through my mind “was he stealing the wallet, phone or both!”
I shook and went out of daze. I informed my parents and they called the police while I kept watch. I saw the man taking out the lady’s purse and leaving the place quietly. Our family followed the man till the road side. Luckily, police were getting efficient and arrived in no time. Out of the blue, from inside the coffee shop, screams were heard. Upon hearing the screams, the man knew, someone had called the police because witnesses saw him. He hopped onto the motorcycle he had parked nearby and started the engines.
Too bad, lady luck was not with him, he had dropped his keys and I picked them up. I was happy at that time as I thought that I had helped the police to catch a thief. The thief ran forward to me and clutched me at my neck. I was shocked. He took out a gun from behind his back and pointed at everyone, preventing them from coming near. My heart was in my mouth and I was scared out of my wits. I looked at him, terrified and disgusted by his breath which smelled like a thousand cloves of garlic and other smelly vegetables. I felt like a hostage held in an action movie.
“Put the gun down and let the boy free!! Now! Or we will shoot!” the police commanded.
The thief smirked and placed the gun on my head. Suddenly, “BANG!” A shot was heard. I thought I was dead and saw stars at that time but when I opened my eyes, one of the police officer’s eye was closed. He had shot the man right in his head. “Headshot. I'M ALIVE!!!”
I rushed out to my parents and hugged them tightly. “Are the police allowed to take out guns and shoot the culprit like in this incident?” I asked my parents.
“No, they were not supposed to take It out but to save my precious son they will have to take out the gun otherwise I will sue them,” My father joked.
After returning the wallet to the lady, we gave our statements to the police and retreated home. What an exciting and fun-filled day with full of dangers too. I hoped that although I was held hostage, I would have another of this day.
Done by:
Edrick Sim
Make the most of what you can do on your PC and the Web, just the way you want. Windows Live
I shook and went out of daze. I informed my parents and they called the police while I kept watch. I saw the man taking out the lady’s purse and leaving the place quietly. Our family followed the man till the road side. Luckily, police were getting efficient and arrived in no time. Out of the blue, from inside the coffee shop, screams were heard. Upon hearing the screams, the man knew, someone had called the police because witnesses saw him. He hopped onto the motorcycle he had parked nearby and started the engines.
Too bad, lady luck was not with him, he had dropped his keys and I picked them up. I was happy at that time as I thought that I had helped the police to catch a thief. The thief ran forward to me and clutched me at my neck. I was shocked. He took out a gun from behind his back and pointed at everyone, preventing them from coming near. My heart was in my mouth and I was scared out of my wits. I looked at him, terrified and disgusted by his breath which smelled like a thousand cloves of garlic and other smelly vegetables. I felt like a hostage held in an action movie.
“Put the gun down and let the boy free!! Now! Or we will shoot!” the police commanded.
The thief smirked and placed the gun on my head. Suddenly, “BANG!” A shot was heard. I thought I was dead and saw stars at that time but when I opened my eyes, one of the police officer’s eye was closed. He had shot the man right in his head. “Headshot. I'M ALIVE!!!”
I rushed out to my parents and hugged them tightly. “Are the police allowed to take out guns and shoot the culprit like in this incident?” I asked my parents.
“No, they were not supposed to take It out but to save my precious son they will have to take out the gun otherwise I will sue them,” My father joked.
After returning the wallet to the lady, we gave our statements to the police and retreated home. What an exciting and fun-filled day with full of dangers too. I hoped that although I was held hostage, I would have another of this day.
Done by:
Edrick Sim
Make the most of what you can do on your PC and the Web, just the way you want. Windows Live
CW: Hwee Hean's Writing (unedited)
Booy was tring his shoe laces at home and was bracing himself for being jeered by hisclassmates for being useless. Never in his life had Booy thought that he would be awardedin his life. The day dawnes crisp and clear and the sun shone in the sky like a fiery red ruby. Booy wasperspiring profusely and decided to go and buy a bottle of coca-cola from the nearbyconvinience store. After purchasing the botlle of Coke and given the change, Booy realisedthat he had only forty-five cents for the bus ride to school. Booy panicked. He had to paythe notorious school bully, Ah Joo, a dollar. Booy decided to standup to the school bullyand he walked to the waiting area to board a bus. Suddenly, a drunkard, who was driving a Ford, hit a boy who was cycling on the road Booy'sjaw dropped. The impact of the crash sent by on the bicycle flying in the air and land onthe other section of the road, about four metres away from the site of the incident. For a moment, Booy and the other commuters were like stones but in the next second, Booyrecovered his senses and shapped into action. He ran across the road, leapt over thedivider and grabbed the boy. When Booy and the boy were about to get back, a lorry was on acoliding course with them. Booy had shocked people who looked at him by running back to thebus stop in only two seconds. Normally, people who cheer loudly for the runner but not inthis dire situation. When Booy was running the road to save the boy from being run overagain, a samaritan had called for the police and ambulance. The loud wailing of sirens announced the arrival of the police and the ambulance. Paramedicsleapt of the ambulance and took the boy from Booy's hands. Luckily, there was no majorinjuries on the boy except for a few superficial wounds on his hands. The paramedics appliedantiseptic to the boy's wounds and bandaged his wounds. The boy was admitted to a hospitaland the police officer approached Booy and asked him for his name. Booy's face got pale andstuttered, "I....I havven't dddone anything wwwwrong!" The police officer said that he would like to present him a medal for being good samaritan. Booy, being a meat-andpotatoes boy, smiled sheepishly at the police officerand went toschool clutching his medal and with the knowledge that even somebody deemed useless as himcould be of goo use.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Be Prepared for New Term
Dear Pupils
1. There will be suppementary classes on Monday (29 Jun 09) and Friday (3 Jul 09) from 1.30 pm. to 3 pm.
2. You will need your Maths Practice 3, NOT Practice 4 on Monday.
3. Do remember your thermometers and Travel Declaration Forms on Monday.
4. See you on Monday.
Yours
Mdm Toh
1. There will be suppementary classes on Monday (29 Jun 09) and Friday (3 Jul 09) from 1.30 pm. to 3 pm.
2. You will need your Maths Practice 3, NOT Practice 4 on Monday.
3. Do remember your thermometers and Travel Declaration Forms on Monday.
4. See you on Monday.
Yours
Mdm Toh
Friday, June 26, 2009
What you need on Monday
Dear Pupils
Below is the list of things you need when school starts on Monday:
1. Working thermometer
2. Travel Declaration form (Very Important, so important that Ms Chua will give a reward to the class that has full return.)
3. EL Prelim Practice Paper 1
4. Volume and Graph topical ws
5. Maths Practice 4 Paper 1 and 2 (4-1 & 4-2)
6. Science Topical WS The Web of Life
7. Your readiness
8. Star Values
See you soon!
Yours
Mdm Toh
P.S. Help to pass the message around esp to those who do not go online and do not have internet access. Thanks.
Below is the list of things you need when school starts on Monday:
1. Working thermometer
2. Travel Declaration form (Very Important, so important that Ms Chua will give a reward to the class that has full return.)
3. EL Prelim Practice Paper 1
4. Volume and Graph topical ws
5. Maths Practice 4 Paper 1 and 2 (4-1 & 4-2)
6. Science Topical WS The Web of Life
7. Your readiness
8. Star Values
See you soon!
Yours
Mdm Toh
P.S. Help to pass the message around esp to those who do not go online and do not have internet access. Thanks.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Important - Please read
Dear Pupils
In a day or two, you will receive a postage mail from school. In the letter, you are required to fill in a travel declaration form. Please fill in the form carefully your travel history during the June holidays. A nil return is necessary even if you did not travel in the holidays.
Get your parents to sign the form and you MUST submit the form to me when school reopens on 29 Jun 09. You also need to have your thermometer with you EVERY DAY when the new term starts.
Please help to convey this piece of information to your classmates. You should also inform me via sms if you do not receive the letter by Friday (26 Jun 09).
Thank you for your attention. Let's work together to keep the flu bug away.
Take care please.
Yours
Mdm Toh
In a day or two, you will receive a postage mail from school. In the letter, you are required to fill in a travel declaration form. Please fill in the form carefully your travel history during the June holidays. A nil return is necessary even if you did not travel in the holidays.
Get your parents to sign the form and you MUST submit the form to me when school reopens on 29 Jun 09. You also need to have your thermometer with you EVERY DAY when the new term starts.
Please help to convey this piece of information to your classmates. You should also inform me via sms if you do not receive the letter by Friday (26 Jun 09).
Thank you for your attention. Let's work together to keep the flu bug away.
Take care please.
Yours
Mdm Toh
Maths Practice 2 Results
1
NAVETHIRA D/O RAVI CHANDRAN 97
2
WU JINGNI 94
3
PEI YAN BO 93
4
NG YAN ZHEN 91
5
ANG QI JIAN 90
6
SIM WEI JIE, EDRICK 90
7
SNG JIA HUI 88.5
8
ONG WEI LONG 88
9
LI ZHIXIAN, RODRICK 88
10
LIM QIAN WEI 87
11
FONG WEI DENG 87
12
LOW SONG DA EMERSON 86
13
NUR NAAZILAH BTE HIDAYATULLAH 85
14
HASZIRAH BTE GHANI 85
15
TRICIA LIM YUN QI 85
16
GOH JIA YING, CHRISTABEL 84
17
CHIA YUN SHAN 83
18
KEE KAH LOK 82
19
MUHAMMAD ASYRAF B ADAM 82
20
TAN GUAN MIN 81.5
21
LIM XUE TING SHIRLEY 81
22
AW HWEE HEAN 80
23
ELUMALAI VAISHNAPRIYA 80
24
ZACKIR HUSSAIN AJMAL ARSATH 77
25
LOH XIAO QI 75
26
SEE JIA YI 75
27
WOON WEE HAN, EUGENE 72
28
AO MINGYI, BELINDA 72
29
YU JING JIE 71
30
LIM YUAN BIN DNS
NAVETHIRA D/O RAVI CHANDRAN 97
2
WU JINGNI 94
3
PEI YAN BO 93
4
NG YAN ZHEN 91
5
ANG QI JIAN 90
6
SIM WEI JIE, EDRICK 90
7
SNG JIA HUI 88.5
8
ONG WEI LONG 88
9
LI ZHIXIAN, RODRICK 88
10
LIM QIAN WEI 87
11
FONG WEI DENG 87
12
LOW SONG DA EMERSON 86
13
NUR NAAZILAH BTE HIDAYATULLAH 85
14
HASZIRAH BTE GHANI 85
15
TRICIA LIM YUN QI 85
16
GOH JIA YING, CHRISTABEL 84
17
CHIA YUN SHAN 83
18
KEE KAH LOK 82
19
MUHAMMAD ASYRAF B ADAM 82
20
TAN GUAN MIN 81.5
21
LIM XUE TING SHIRLEY 81
22
AW HWEE HEAN 80
23
ELUMALAI VAISHNAPRIYA 80
24
ZACKIR HUSSAIN AJMAL ARSATH 77
25
LOH XIAO QI 75
26
SEE JIA YI 75
27
WOON WEE HAN, EUGENE 72
28
AO MINGYI, BELINDA 72
29
YU JING JIE 71
30
LIM YUAN BIN DNS
Monday, June 22, 2009
HBL List of WS/Practice Papers
English
1. Synthesis & Transformation 21 to 30
2.Vocabulary in Context 21 to 30
3. Grammar Cloze 1 to 15
4. Comprehension Cloze 1 to 21
5. Editing Tests 21 to 40
6. Comprehension OE 1 to 7
7. Comprehension MCQ 1 to 9
8. P6 Prelim Practice Paper 1
9. P6 Prelim Practice Paper 2
10. P6 Prelim Practice Paper 3
11. Oral Practice Pictures
Maths
1. Volume Topical WS
2. Graph Topical WS
3. Practice 2 Papers 1 and 2
4. Practice 3 Papers 1 and 2
5. Practice 4 Papers 1 and 2
Science
1. WS: Chapter 5 The Web of Life
2. WS: Chapter 6 Adaptations
3. WS: Chapter 7 Man & Environment
4.Prelim Practice Paper Booklets 5A and 5B
5. P6 Science Revision Paper 1A & 1B
6. P6 Science Revision Paper 2A & 2B
1. Synthesis & Transformation 21 to 30
2.Vocabulary in Context 21 to 30
3. Grammar Cloze 1 to 15
4. Comprehension Cloze 1 to 21
5. Editing Tests 21 to 40
6. Comprehension OE 1 to 7
7. Comprehension MCQ 1 to 9
8. P6 Prelim Practice Paper 1
9. P6 Prelim Practice Paper 2
10. P6 Prelim Practice Paper 3
11. Oral Practice Pictures
Maths
1. Volume Topical WS
2. Graph Topical WS
3. Practice 2 Papers 1 and 2
4. Practice 3 Papers 1 and 2
5. Practice 4 Papers 1 and 2
Science
1. WS: Chapter 5 The Web of Life
2. WS: Chapter 6 Adaptations
3. WS: Chapter 7 Man & Environment
4.Prelim Practice Paper Booklets 5A and 5B
5. P6 Science Revision Paper 1A & 1B
6. P6 Science Revision Paper 2A & 2B
Saturday, June 20, 2009
22 June 09 Supplementary Class
Dear pupils
Please note that on Monday, there will be temperature taking. You NEED to have your working thermometers with you.
We will be covering the Science Ws on Environment.
Following that, there'll be a post CW discussion.
Assemble at 0755 SHARP at the parade ground.
See you!
Yours
Mdm Toh
Please note that on Monday, there will be temperature taking. You NEED to have your working thermometers with you.
We will be covering the Science Ws on Environment.
Following that, there'll be a post CW discussion.
Assemble at 0755 SHARP at the parade ground.
See you!
Yours
Mdm Toh
Friday, June 12, 2009
CW - Picture: An accident involving a bicycle
For years, I have not touched a bicycle. Neither do I foresee myself ever zipping around on one in the future. The sheer thought of cycling sends shudders down my spine and the vivid gory scene will replay itself in my mind, bringing back memories of an accident encountered by a dear friend, Peter.
That fateful morning, I was at the bus stop, that bus stop. I was early as usual. Peter would not be in sight till another ten minutes. While waiting, I fantasized how I would look like riding on that coolest bicycle which would soon be my priciest possession. A potential proud owner of a BMX, I ginned to myself.
"Ring, ring, ring," I heard Peter's signature announcement of his arrival. From a distance, I looked in silent envy his superb handling of his bicycle. I vowed to like him one day! I stood up from the bench, giving him a wave in the air when I noticed a goods van gaining on Peter. Apparently, whoever driving in the van had exceeded the speed limit and was a road hazard.
Peter, on noticing the van coming fast and furious behind him, was taken aback. He steered out from the lane, a quick but terribly wrong move, attempting to give way. He leg power was however not a match to the wheels of the revving van. I watched from the opposite side of the road with clenched fists, praying that the worst would not happen.
Panicked, he soon lost control of his bicycle. His bicycle wobbled from side to side only inches ahead of the van. "Peter, watch out!" I screamed across the road, my heart beating faster than ever.
He steadied on his pedalling, attempting to take control. Needless to say, his attempts were futile. By then, the reckless van driver had already hit him from the side.
The bicycle fell over to the side, throwing Peter lying face down on the road. The van screeched noisily to a stop.
An accident. So many times I read in the papers about road accidents. Never had I ever expected myself to witness one unfolding before my eyes. I gasped, my heart almost stopped beating for a few seconds. Paralysed by fear, I was at my wits' end.
The door of the van opened. Out came the errant driver. For a minute, I was thankful that I was not alone at the scene. Walking towards Peter's motionless body, he committed the most inhuman act in the world. Instead of rendering help, the callous driver slipped his hand into the side pocket of Peter's pants to remove his wallet. He returned to his van and drove off, leaving a trail of dust behind and was never to be seen again,
"Oh my God! How could he?" I muttered, infuriated and disgusted.
I ran across the road. Peter's face was drained of colours. Other than his grazed elbows, there were no other visible external injuries.
"Peter, Peter, are you all right?" I shook his shoulder.
Much to my relief, he lifted his head feebly. Forcing a smile on his writhing face, he struggled to say, "Help me up, pal."
I gingerly pulled him up. After settling him down on the pavement, I quickly propped up his bicycle and wheeled it to the side of the road. The bicycle had survived the impact of the knock without a single scratch. What a miracle! Peter was lucky enough to have escaped almost unscathed. The colours on his face were back. He stood up and returned to his usual gait after a few steps of hobbling.
"That van driver must be very disappointed when he can't even find a single cent in my wallet. Let's leave this place," Peter said with a chuckle.
I really marvelled at Peter. I was more shaken by the accident than he was. He still cycled around but always with his helmet on. The driver went scot free as Peter did not want to pursue the matter. As for me, the fantasy of owning a BMX was no longer a fantasy,
That fateful morning, I was at the bus stop, that bus stop. I was early as usual. Peter would not be in sight till another ten minutes. While waiting, I fantasized how I would look like riding on that coolest bicycle which would soon be my priciest possession. A potential proud owner of a BMX, I ginned to myself.
"Ring, ring, ring," I heard Peter's signature announcement of his arrival. From a distance, I looked in silent envy his superb handling of his bicycle. I vowed to like him one day! I stood up from the bench, giving him a wave in the air when I noticed a goods van gaining on Peter. Apparently, whoever driving in the van had exceeded the speed limit and was a road hazard.
Peter, on noticing the van coming fast and furious behind him, was taken aback. He steered out from the lane, a quick but terribly wrong move, attempting to give way. He leg power was however not a match to the wheels of the revving van. I watched from the opposite side of the road with clenched fists, praying that the worst would not happen.
Panicked, he soon lost control of his bicycle. His bicycle wobbled from side to side only inches ahead of the van. "Peter, watch out!" I screamed across the road, my heart beating faster than ever.
He steadied on his pedalling, attempting to take control. Needless to say, his attempts were futile. By then, the reckless van driver had already hit him from the side.
The bicycle fell over to the side, throwing Peter lying face down on the road. The van screeched noisily to a stop.
An accident. So many times I read in the papers about road accidents. Never had I ever expected myself to witness one unfolding before my eyes. I gasped, my heart almost stopped beating for a few seconds. Paralysed by fear, I was at my wits' end.
The door of the van opened. Out came the errant driver. For a minute, I was thankful that I was not alone at the scene. Walking towards Peter's motionless body, he committed the most inhuman act in the world. Instead of rendering help, the callous driver slipped his hand into the side pocket of Peter's pants to remove his wallet. He returned to his van and drove off, leaving a trail of dust behind and was never to be seen again,
"Oh my God! How could he?" I muttered, infuriated and disgusted.
I ran across the road. Peter's face was drained of colours. Other than his grazed elbows, there were no other visible external injuries.
"Peter, Peter, are you all right?" I shook his shoulder.
Much to my relief, he lifted his head feebly. Forcing a smile on his writhing face, he struggled to say, "Help me up, pal."
I gingerly pulled him up. After settling him down on the pavement, I quickly propped up his bicycle and wheeled it to the side of the road. The bicycle had survived the impact of the knock without a single scratch. What a miracle! Peter was lucky enough to have escaped almost unscathed. The colours on his face were back. He stood up and returned to his usual gait after a few steps of hobbling.
"That van driver must be very disappointed when he can't even find a single cent in my wallet. Let's leave this place," Peter said with a chuckle.
I really marvelled at Peter. I was more shaken by the accident than he was. He still cycled around but always with his helmet on. The driver went scot free as Peter did not want to pursue the matter. As for me, the fantasy of owning a BMX was no longer a fantasy,
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
SW - Sentosa Annual Castle Building Competition
Dear Kathy
You are the first person that I thought of when I saw the poster on the notice board at my void deck. There will be a sandcastle building competition at Siloso Beach Resort on 14 July 2009, from 9am to 1 pm. (1m) Themed "My Crea tion"(1m), the competition is jointly organised by Siloso Beach Resort, Pepsi (S) and Tourism Board of Singapore (1m). The team that comes in first stands to win a cash prize of $2000 (1m).
To take part in this competition, we are required to register at Siloso Beach Resort in person and pay a registration fee of $5 per person before 9 June 2009. (1m)
I can't wait to hear the good news from you. I hope you and I can form a team to participate in this rare and interesting competition. (1m)
Your best friend
Rachel
1. Guan Min 15
2. Yan Bo 10
3. Hwee Hean 13
4. Qi Jian 11
5. Chloe 11
6. Nadiah 13
7. Debbie 13
8. Lynn 11
9. Jin Hao 15
10. Meng Yu 12
11. Hui Xin 13
12. Juliano 12
13. Emerson 13
14. Cassandra 10
15. Jacelyn 11
16. Jia Yi 11
17. Xiao Qi 12
18. Naazilah 13
19. Yan Zhen 13
20. Rodrick 11
21. Belinda 13
22. Wei Deng 10
23. Christabel 12
24. Priya 13
25. Yun Shan 13
26. Jia Hui 11
27. Jing Ni 10
28. Asyraf 9
29. Navethira 11
30. Eugene 11
31. Kah Lok 11
32. Qian Wei 9
33. Haszirah 14
34. Shirley 15
35. Ajmal 13
36. Wei Long 12
37. Tricia 10
38. Jing Jie 11
39. Edrick 10
40. Yuan Bin (abs)
41. Xin Yu (abs)
42. Xi Min (dns)
You are the first person that I thought of when I saw the poster on the notice board at my void deck. There will be a sandcastle building competition at Siloso Beach Resort on 14 July 2009, from 9am to 1 pm. (1m) Themed "My Crea tion"(1m), the competition is jointly organised by Siloso Beach Resort, Pepsi (S) and Tourism Board of Singapore (1m). The team that comes in first stands to win a cash prize of $2000 (1m).
To take part in this competition, we are required to register at Siloso Beach Resort in person and pay a registration fee of $5 per person before 9 June 2009. (1m)
I can't wait to hear the good news from you. I hope you and I can form a team to participate in this rare and interesting competition. (1m)
Your best friend
Rachel
1. Guan Min 15
2. Yan Bo 10
3. Hwee Hean 13
4. Qi Jian 11
5. Chloe 11
6. Nadiah 13
7. Debbie 13
8. Lynn 11
9. Jin Hao 15
10. Meng Yu 12
11. Hui Xin 13
12. Juliano 12
13. Emerson 13
14. Cassandra 10
15. Jacelyn 11
16. Jia Yi 11
17. Xiao Qi 12
18. Naazilah 13
19. Yan Zhen 13
20. Rodrick 11
21. Belinda 13
22. Wei Deng 10
23. Christabel 12
24. Priya 13
25. Yun Shan 13
26. Jia Hui 11
27. Jing Ni 10
28. Asyraf 9
29. Navethira 11
30. Eugene 11
31. Kah Lok 11
32. Qian Wei 9
33. Haszirah 14
34. Shirley 15
35. Ajmal 13
36. Wei Long 12
37. Tricia 10
38. Jing Jie 11
39. Edrick 10
40. Yuan Bin (abs)
41. Xin Yu (abs)
42. Xi Min (dns)
CW feedback - Chloe's writing
C13 L12
Writer had written about a motorcyclist instead of a cyclist.
1. frozed
2. dailed
3. laying on the floor
4. passer bys
5. lied on the road
6. The ambulance arrived within ten minutes and the police too.
Writer had written about a motorcyclist instead of a cyclist.
1. frozed
2. dailed
3. laying on the floor
4. passer bys
5. lied on the road
6. The ambulance arrived within ten minutes and the police too.
CW feedback - Kah Lok's writing
C 12 L13
Story flows very fluently. It's a pity that the writer merely touched and go on each idea. He should have worked on each idea and provided more details.
Story flows very fluently. It's a pity that the writer merely touched and go on each idea. He should have worked on each idea and provided more details.
CW feedback - Lynn's writing
C 14 L 14
Good effort put in although there are some missing loops.
1. concidentally
2. The woman was wearing lots of jewelleries and the clothes were branded, even her handbag.
3. I heavied a sigh of relief when the man suddenly attacked the policemen.
4. leaded
Good effort put in although there are some missing loops.
1. concidentally
2. The woman was wearing lots of jewelleries and the clothes were branded, even her handbag.
3. I heavied a sigh of relief when the man suddenly attacked the policemen.
4. leaded
CW feedback - Debbie's writing
C 15 L 13
Ideas are good and adequately expanded. A good attempt. To better, writer needs to be more cautious in her grammar and to avoid ambiguity in content.
1. out of a sudden
2. saw the man took out
3. screamt as loud as possibe
4. freezed
5. All of us was
6. All the male patrons at the coffee shop ran and chase after the man, including my father.
7. suprised
8. did not thought
9. after 15 minutes
10. had learn
Ideas are good and adequately expanded. A good attempt. To better, writer needs to be more cautious in her grammar and to avoid ambiguity in content.
1. out of a sudden
2. saw the man took out
3. screamt as loud as possibe
4. freezed
5. All of us was
6. All the male patrons at the coffee shop ran and chase after the man, including my father.
7. suprised
8. did not thought
9. after 15 minutes
10. had learn
CW feedback - Qi Jian's writing
C 13 L 13
Writer put in effort to use appropriate vocabulary. Same amount of effort must also be put in to elaborate and expand the main ideas to boost the content.
1. Laying in a sprawl, legs and arms in contorted position.
2. After the ambulance left, what remained on the road was spots of blood and smitereens of glass.
Writer put in effort to use appropriate vocabulary. Same amount of effort must also be put in to elaborate and expand the main ideas to boost the content.
1. Laying in a sprawl, legs and arms in contorted position.
2. After the ambulance left, what remained on the road was spots of blood and smitereens of glass.
CW feedback - Hwee Hean's Writing
C17 L17
A novel-like story woven with good vocabulary. The piece shows writer's sharp observation in things happening around him. Writer could have put the highlight on the thief rather than the angry customer and the novice waitress.
Good vocab
1. an aroma of strong coffee and freshly brewed tea wafted across the coffee shop
2. bustling business
3. oppressively hot
4. scrambled to take down their orders
5. laden with beer bottles and porcelain cups of coffee
6. berate
7. carted the thief off
Mistakes
1. hesistation
2. dailled
3. skillful
4. pespiring
5. eating & drinking
A novel-like story woven with good vocabulary. The piece shows writer's sharp observation in things happening around him. Writer could have put the highlight on the thief rather than the angry customer and the novice waitress.
Good vocab
1. an aroma of strong coffee and freshly brewed tea wafted across the coffee shop
2. bustling business
3. oppressively hot
4. scrambled to take down their orders
5. laden with beer bottles and porcelain cups of coffee
6. berate
7. carted the thief off
Mistakes
1. hesistation
2. dailled
3. skillful
4. pespiring
5. eating & drinking
CW feedback - Jing Jie's Writing
C17 L17
An exciting piece with well-managed multiple climaxes. Good job!
An exciting piece with well-managed multiple climaxes. Good job!
CW feedback - Hui Xin's Writing
C 12 L 14
The story started off very well with very vivid descriptions of the setting, characters and events unfolding. However, the story ended before a climax could have happened. What a pity!
The story started off very well with very vivid descriptions of the setting, characters and events unfolding. However, the story ended before a climax could have happened. What a pity!
CW feedback - Belinda's writing
C 17 L 18
An excellent piece. Good use of vocabulary and good management of the development of the story to keep the readers interested. Well done!
1. squeals and giggles from the energetic children
2. the loud chatters of housewives
3. tucking into their food
4. savour the aroma wafting from the bowl
5. piping hot soup
6. roving eyes
7. haf-zipped bag
8. shot me a blood-chilling stare
9. let loose a torrent of profanity
10. temper as foul as his face
11. a sheepish look
12. let out a hude growl
An excellent piece. Good use of vocabulary and good management of the development of the story to keep the readers interested. Well done!
1. squeals and giggles from the energetic children
2. the loud chatters of housewives
3. tucking into their food
4. savour the aroma wafting from the bowl
5. piping hot soup
6. roving eyes
7. haf-zipped bag
8. shot me a blood-chilling stare
9. let loose a torrent of profanity
10. temper as foul as his face
11. a sheepish look
12. let out a hude growl
CW feedback - Xiao Qi's Writing
C 14 L14
Writer should have crafted his unique introduction rather than taking wholesale from the question. A couple of missing words here and there, suggesting that editing was not thorough and careful. Minor flaws like these undermine the quality of a good piece of writing.
Writer should have crafted his unique introduction rather than taking wholesale from the question. A couple of missing words here and there, suggesting that editing was not thorough and careful. Minor flaws like these undermine the quality of a good piece of writing.
CW feedback - Yan Zhen's wrting
C12 L12
A simple and plain story. Writer should attempt to spice up the story by providing more vivid details. The thief was subdued too easily. Make opposing force should be stronger.
A simple and plain story. Writer should attempt to spice up the story by providing more vivid details. The thief was subdued too easily. Make opposing force should be stronger.
CW feedback - Rodrick's writing
C11 L13
Writer can write very fluently with almost perfect language. Unfortunately, there are two fat chunks of dead wood which are not relevant to the story. Refrain from beginning a story with waking up, toilet visits, washing up. Such details do not serve much purpose. Please bear this in mind.
Writer can write very fluently with almost perfect language. Unfortunately, there are two fat chunks of dead wood which are not relevant to the story. Refrain from beginning a story with waking up, toilet visits, washing up. Such details do not serve much purpose. Please bear this in mind.
CW feedback - Jing Ni's writing
C 13 L13
Writer has made vast improvement in writing skills. Keep up with your reading to scale greater heights. Your spelling needs polishing.
Writer has made vast improvement in writing skills. Keep up with your reading to scale greater heights. Your spelling needs polishing.
CW feedback - Asyraf's writing
C 14 L 14
A very fluent piece with events unfolding logically.
1. their backs was facing me
2. in the corner of my eye, I noticed...
A very fluent piece with events unfolding logically.
1. their backs was facing me
2. in the corner of my eye, I noticed...
CW feedback - Navethira's writing
C 15 L 14
Interesting piece. Writer was able to sustain the reader's interest with fast paced development of events and a surprising twist in the end. Quite a few spelling mistakes to correct.
1. my father than apologised to the man
2. my father then retrieved his particulars.
3. decibles
4. inocent
5. mastered up the courage
6.murmed
7. hillarious
Interesting piece. Writer was able to sustain the reader's interest with fast paced development of events and a surprising twist in the end. Quite a few spelling mistakes to correct.
1. my father than apologised to the man
2. my father then retrieved his particulars.
3. decibles
4. inocent
5. mastered up the courage
6.murmed
7. hillarious
CW feedback - Jia Yi's writing
C 15 L 13
A good piece with appropriate use of vocabulary. Writer should aim at writing a piece free from spelling and grammar mistakes. Adequate elaboration of the act of the thief and how he was nabbed.
Good voacb
1. I replied, exasperated
2. swivelled her head
3. snapped back into reality
4. chided
Mistakes
1. I was too shock to react
2. valueables
3. an indeliable memory
A good piece with appropriate use of vocabulary. Writer should aim at writing a piece free from spelling and grammar mistakes. Adequate elaboration of the act of the thief and how he was nabbed.
Good voacb
1. I replied, exasperated
2. swivelled her head
3. snapped back into reality
4. chided
Mistakes
1. I was too shock to react
2. valueables
3. an indeliable memory
Monday, June 8, 2009
CW feedback - Wei Deng's writing
C 13 L 13
Writer should take pains in writing his own introduction rather than copying it wholesale from the question. Be more mindful in the use of the correct tense especially in direct speeches. Good writing comes with careful editing.
1. As I was about to take a sip of your soup,
2. I thought to myself, "Should I shout that there was a thief?"
3. I shouted at the long of my voice.
4. Some teenagers and others came to join you in chasing the thief.
5. Just down, the sirens of the police came apporaching.
Writer should take pains in writing his own introduction rather than copying it wholesale from the question. Be more mindful in the use of the correct tense especially in direct speeches. Good writing comes with careful editing.
1. As I was about to take a sip of your soup,
2. I thought to myself, "Should I shout that there was a thief?"
3. I shouted at the long of my voice.
4. Some teenagers and others came to join you in chasing the thief.
5. Just down, the sirens of the police came apporaching.
CW feedback - Meng Yu's writing
C 14 L 13
Good management of thoughts and ideas. Some parts need more details and must be more clearly expressed.
1. curiousity
Good management of thoughts and ideas. Some parts need more details and must be more clearly expressed.
1. curiousity
CW feedback - Edrick's writing
C 15 L 13
Story is rich and filled with actions. There are some points in the story which needs to be filled in with more elaboration.
1. He hopped onto the motorcycle he had parked nearby and started the engines.
2. Luckily, police was efficient and arrived in no time.
Story is rich and filled with actions. There are some points in the story which needs to be filled in with more elaboration.
1. He hopped onto the motorcycle he had parked nearby and started the engines.
2. Luckily, police was efficient and arrived in no time.
CW feedback - Ajmal's writing
C 12 L 12
The basic structure of a story is evident. Writer now has to work on adding more details to every idea so that he can paint a more vivid picture in his readers' minds.
Mistakes
1. unexpecldly
2. sticked out her walking stick
3. blarring
4. in the mean time
The basic structure of a story is evident. Writer now has to work on adding more details to every idea so that he can paint a more vivid picture in his readers' minds.
Mistakes
1. unexpecldly
2. sticked out her walking stick
3. blarring
4. in the mean time
CW feedback - Emerson's writing
C 13 12
Writer has made improvement in his language and is able to express his ideas quite well. It is now time to work on substantiating the ideas.
1. It was mum's birthday
2. to informed
3. When dad saw it, He quicky chased after the thief.
4. The luck lady was not on his side.
5. The police officer thanked dad and brought the man to the police station.
Writer has made improvement in his language and is able to express his ideas quite well. It is now time to work on substantiating the ideas.
1. It was mum's birthday
2. to informed
3. When dad saw it, He quicky chased after the thief.
4. The luck lady was not on his side.
5. The police officer thanked dad and brought the man to the police station.
CW feedback - Wei Long's writing
C 13 L 13
Story is fluent but plain. Story developes too fast and too smoothly. Writer should create some opposing forces in the story. A story with no problems is a dull story.
Take not of the use of punctuation marks especially when using direct speeches.
1. scott-free
2. "Stop you thief!" I yelled and pointed at the thef, as I went, against my conscience.
3. fished outan identification card of a policewoman of her face
4 "Goodness me. What a scare." I muttered to myself.
Story is fluent but plain. Story developes too fast and too smoothly. Writer should create some opposing forces in the story. A story with no problems is a dull story.
Take not of the use of punctuation marks especially when using direct speeches.
1. scott-free
2. "Stop you thief!" I yelled and pointed at the thef, as I went, against my conscience.
3. fished outan identification card of a policewoman of her face
4 "Goodness me. What a scare." I muttered to myself.
CW feedback - Eugene;s writing
C 14 L 12
An average piece with enough relevant ideas though they can be more developed. Writer needs to check the sequence of events and the clarity in expressing his ideas. Refrain from writing jail terms and fines. We've discussed umpteen times in class that these are not very realistic.
1. sorching hot afternoon
2. momment
3. the bonet of the Honda civic
4. to dialled
5. The police and the paramedics came and cordoned off the area.
6. hancuffed
An average piece with enough relevant ideas though they can be more developed. Writer needs to check the sequence of events and the clarity in expressing his ideas. Refrain from writing jail terms and fines. We've discussed umpteen times in class that these are not very realistic.
1. sorching hot afternoon
2. momment
3. the bonet of the Honda civic
4. to dialled
5. The police and the paramedics came and cordoned off the area.
6. hancuffed
CW feedback- Tricia's Writing
C 15 L 14
Writer's writing skills have shown significant improvement with ideas adequately developed and appropriate use of vocabulary.
1. impending danger
2. groaned in excruciating pain
3. aggravate the pain
Mistakes
1. He felt unconscious and run through the sea of faces around him.
2. he black out
3. did not realised
Writer's writing skills have shown significant improvement with ideas adequately developed and appropriate use of vocabulary.
1. impending danger
2. groaned in excruciating pain
3. aggravate the pain
Mistakes
1. He felt unconscious and run through the sea of faces around him.
2. he black out
3. did not realised
Sunday, June 7, 2009
CW feedback - Jia Hui's writing
C 12 L 9
The basic structure of the composition is there but Writer has to work on expressing his ideas in proper sentence structures. Many mistakes could be avoided if the editing had been more thorough.
1. It was five-thirty in the evening, I was on my way home.
2. walking passed
3. might had happened
4. had been knock
5. many people started to see and the driver also came out.
6. Second later,
7. scence
8. tracffic
9. peramedicts
10. After all these happenings, it thaught me that I should cycle in the middle of the road but cycle at the side.
The basic structure of the composition is there but Writer has to work on expressing his ideas in proper sentence structures. Many mistakes could be avoided if the editing had been more thorough.
1. It was five-thirty in the evening, I was on my way home.
2. walking passed
3. might had happened
4. had been knock
5. many people started to see and the driver also came out.
6. Second later,
7. scence
8. tracffic
9. peramedicts
10. After all these happenings, it thaught me that I should cycle in the middle of the road but cycle at the side.
CW feedback - Naazilah's feedback
C 14 L 14
Good attempt in writing a narrative with a proper introduction, leading events, climax and resolution. Some parts of the story become dead wood because they were not addressed in the later part of the story.
Content can be further enhanced if more of the damages and injuries had been described.
Good attempt in writing a narrative with a proper introduction, leading events, climax and resolution. Some parts of the story become dead wood because they were not addressed in the later part of the story.
Content can be further enhanced if more of the damages and injuries had been described.
CW feedback - Haszirah's feedback
C 12 L 11
A simple story. Writer needs to be more vivid in her description. Readers are unable to see a clear picture of the developments of the story because of the plain description.
1. I pressed the break immediately.
2. I opened my eyes to do something.
3. Everyone who witnessed the accident gave me one kind of look.
4. I carried the boy into my car and his bicycle into the bonet.
5. had not abided to rules
A simple story. Writer needs to be more vivid in her description. Readers are unable to see a clear picture of the developments of the story because of the plain description.
1. I pressed the break immediately.
2. I opened my eyes to do something.
3. Everyone who witnessed the accident gave me one kind of look.
4. I carried the boy into my car and his bicycle into the bonet.
5. had not abided to rules
CW feedback - Jacelyn
C 15 L 13
Fluent and relatively well developed. A pleasant read. However, I find it not very realistic for the writer feel relieved at the end of the story after witnessing the death of a cyclist.
Good Vocab
1. screeching of brakes
2. thrust off his bicycle
3. blood was seen fowing out from his temple
4. his bicycle was hurled a distance away
5. this petrifying sight
6. took the chance to escape
Mistakes
1. laid still on the ground
2. passer-bys
3. tried to assit them
4. heaved a sigh of relieve
5. The crowd was soon dismissed from the scene.
Fluent and relatively well developed. A pleasant read. However, I find it not very realistic for the writer feel relieved at the end of the story after witnessing the death of a cyclist.
Good Vocab
1. screeching of brakes
2. thrust off his bicycle
3. blood was seen fowing out from his temple
4. his bicycle was hurled a distance away
5. this petrifying sight
6. took the chance to escape
Mistakes
1. laid still on the ground
2. passer-bys
3. tried to assit them
4. heaved a sigh of relieve
5. The crowd was soon dismissed from the scene.
CW feedback - Yun Shan's writing
C 12 L 10
A mediocre piece. Content can be strengthened if points like how the cyclist lost control of the bike, how the accident took place and more specific details were given.
Writer also did not xplain why the casualty had to be hospitalised for about three to four months when he only sustained minor injuries.
1. heard a familiar voice called out
2. saw his uncle waving towards him
3. There was still alot of people
4. fear-strickened
5. Bob informed some of the relatives.
6. sweared
7. saw the ice-cream truck drove near
A mediocre piece. Content can be strengthened if points like how the cyclist lost control of the bike, how the accident took place and more specific details were given.
Writer also did not xplain why the casualty had to be hospitalised for about three to four months when he only sustained minor injuries.
1. heard a familiar voice called out
2. saw his uncle waving towards him
3. There was still alot of people
4. fear-strickened
5. Bob informed some of the relatives.
6. sweared
7. saw the ice-cream truck drove near
CW feedback - Priya's writng
C 9 L 9
Writer did not study the picture carefully. The picture shows a cyclist but she wrote about a motorcyclist. The logic of the flow of story has to be strengthened. More thoughts must be put in in crafting a sensible and coherent story.
1. horizontal road
2. the orange traffic light was flashing
3. When I was in a conscious state, I fount myself in the hospital
4. He scolded me for my hastiness.
Writer did not study the picture carefully. The picture shows a cyclist but she wrote about a motorcyclist. The logic of the flow of story has to be strengthened. More thoughts must be put in in crafting a sensible and coherent story.
1. horizontal road
2. the orange traffic light was flashing
3. When I was in a conscious state, I fount myself in the hospital
4. He scolded me for my hastiness.
CW feedback - Christabel's writing
C 12 L 8
The composition is flawed by the number of language mistakes and awkward sentence structures. Writer also wrote about jail terms which is discouraged. Direct speech is not used.
1. did not saw
2. it was learnt that if you drink you should not drive.
The composition is flawed by the number of language mistakes and awkward sentence structures. Writer also wrote about jail terms which is discouraged. Direct speech is not used.
1. did not saw
2. it was learnt that if you drink you should not drive.
CW feedback - Qian Wei's writing
C 12 L 7
Writer is capable of creating a fine story line but has to consciously work on improving her grammar. There are more than 10 mistakes made in tenses.
1. I recalled what happen that day.
2. That day, he ride so fast.
3. Insted
4. I reach for my handphone but could not find.
5. Do you need me to sent him to the hospital?
Writer is capable of creating a fine story line but has to consciously work on improving her grammar. There are more than 10 mistakes made in tenses.
1. I recalled what happen that day.
2. That day, he ride so fast.
3. Insted
4. I reach for my handphone but could not find.
5. Do you need me to sent him to the hospital?
Saturday, June 6, 2009
CW feedback - Shirley's writng
C 9 L 2 Total 11
Writer needs to work on improving her use of language. There are far too many mistakes for the readers to accept. The quality of the story is greatly discounted due to the number of grammar errors.
1. me and my sister and my brother were playng Monopoly
2. take care of me and my siblings
3. me and my siblngs felt very bored
4. ... but Sunday many people do not have work
5. the driver step on the brakes
6. did not stopped
Writer needs to work on improving her use of language. There are far too many mistakes for the readers to accept. The quality of the story is greatly discounted due to the number of grammar errors.
1. me and my sister and my brother were playng Monopoly
2. take care of me and my siblings
3. me and my siblngs felt very bored
4. ... but Sunday many people do not have work
5. the driver step on the brakes
6. did not stopped
CW feedback - Cassandra's writing
C 12 L 9 Total 19
An average piece of writing. Adequate relevant ideas but not well expressed and developed. Writer has to work on the organisation of her flow of thoughts and contructing sound and logical sentences.
An average piece of writing. Adequate relevant ideas but not well expressed and developed. Writer has to work on the organisation of her flow of thoughts and contructing sound and logical sentences.
CW feedback - Juliano's writing
C 14 C 13 Total 27/40
Writer has good command of English and is able to compose an interesting story. It's a shame that spelling errors can be found everywhere in the composition.
Good vocab
1. mounted on my bike and took off
2. my stomach churned
3. thought rashly
4. blocked my conscience out
5. an ear-piercng screech blasted my ear-drums
Mistakes
1. futre
2. ferousiousy
3. persperation
4. schreeched
5. forhead
6. only 5 more minutes till I am late
7. the otherside of the road
8. a trajegy struck
9. Before it could hit, everythng went blurr.
7. at a dilema
8
7.
Writer has good command of English and is able to compose an interesting story. It's a shame that spelling errors can be found everywhere in the composition.
Good vocab
1. mounted on my bike and took off
2. my stomach churned
3. thought rashly
4. blocked my conscience out
5. an ear-piercng screech blasted my ear-drums
Mistakes
1. futre
2. ferousiousy
3. persperation
4. schreeched
5. forhead
6. only 5 more minutes till I am late
7. the otherside of the road
8. a trajegy struck
9. Before it could hit, everythng went blurr.
7. at a dilema
8
7.
CW feedback - Guan Min's writing
C 13 L 14 Total 27/40
Good effort put in to develop an interesting story. The writng offers a variety of sentence structures, including apt use of questions at the right junctures. Almost free from language mistakes. SHould have been more vivid in the description of the damages and injuries. Some ideas can be further developed for a stronger content.
Good Vocab
1. consumed with shock and guilt
2. spurted everything without even stopping to catch my breath
3. shuffling footsteps of an approaching person
Mistakes
1. A screeched of brakes
2. twentyth August
3. had ran
Good effort put in to develop an interesting story. The writng offers a variety of sentence structures, including apt use of questions at the right junctures. Almost free from language mistakes. SHould have been more vivid in the description of the damages and injuries. Some ideas can be further developed for a stronger content.
Good Vocab
1. consumed with shock and guilt
2. spurted everything without even stopping to catch my breath
3. shuffling footsteps of an approaching person
Mistakes
1. A screeched of brakes
2. twentyth August
3. had ran
CW feedback - Hwee Hean's writing
C 14 L 13 Total 27/40
Hwee Hean never fails to impress me with his abundance of ideas and fluency in expressing them. This piece of narraction is evident of a budding writer. There are some missing loops that need to be filled in. Some ideas have become dead wood because they are not addressed in the later part of the story. A couple of spelling mistakes too.
Good Vocab
1. bracing himself
2. throaty and raspy voice
3. smiled sheepishly
4. gingerly wrapped
Mistakes
1. pespiring
2. only 45 cents
3. school bullys
4. convinence store
5. four metres away from the sight of the accident
6. cordorned off
Hwee Hean never fails to impress me with his abundance of ideas and fluency in expressing them. This piece of narraction is evident of a budding writer. There are some missing loops that need to be filled in. Some ideas have become dead wood because they are not addressed in the later part of the story. A couple of spelling mistakes too.
Good Vocab
1. bracing himself
2. throaty and raspy voice
3. smiled sheepishly
4. gingerly wrapped
Mistakes
1. pespiring
2. only 45 cents
3. school bullys
4. convinence store
5. four metres away from the sight of the accident
6. cordorned off
CW feedback - Yan Bo's writing
C 14 L 13 Total 27/40
Good attempt in application of good vocabulary in the composition. However, it is not very clear to the readers whether the main character was walking or cycling. Writer needs to be clearer in expressing the ideas.
Good Vocab:
1. muttered matter-of-factly
2. an earth-shattering boom
3. thrown in the air like a rag doll
4. landed in a heap
5. knew the gravity of the situation
Mistakes:
1.... as they rush out og the school...
2. "Let's cycle fastly across the road."
3. At the juncture, a car is speeding towards John.
4. John was threw in the air...
5. "Quickly, sent hm to the hospital!" I shouted.
Good attempt in application of good vocabulary in the composition. However, it is not very clear to the readers whether the main character was walking or cycling. Writer needs to be clearer in expressing the ideas.
Good Vocab:
1. muttered matter-of-factly
2. an earth-shattering boom
3. thrown in the air like a rag doll
4. landed in a heap
5. knew the gravity of the situation
Mistakes:
1.... as they rush out og the school...
2. "Let's cycle fastly across the road."
3. At the juncture, a car is speeding towards John.
4. John was threw in the air...
5. "Quickly, sent hm to the hospital!" I shouted.
CW feedback - Jin Hao's writing
C 15 L 14 Total 29/40
Very fluent piece. Almost error free in terms of language. However, details such as the damage of the accident and the severity of the cyclist's injuries were not given. Also, writer did not explain why there was a need for the cyclist to be hospitalised for two months. Try not to include how the characters are punished by law eg. jail terms or fines. We've discussed that in class many times and have concluded that it is not realistic to write that.
Good vocab:
1. a horn blared
2. the screeching of tyres
3. bore the brunt of the impact
4. stood mouth agape
5. crushed under the car
Mistakes:
1. strecher
2. When he regained conscious, ...
3. He saw his parents by his side as well as the passer-by that saved his life.
2.
Very fluent piece. Almost error free in terms of language. However, details such as the damage of the accident and the severity of the cyclist's injuries were not given. Also, writer did not explain why there was a need for the cyclist to be hospitalised for two months. Try not to include how the characters are punished by law eg. jail terms or fines. We've discussed that in class many times and have concluded that it is not realistic to write that.
Good vocab:
1. a horn blared
2. the screeching of tyres
3. bore the brunt of the impact
4. stood mouth agape
5. crushed under the car
Mistakes:
1. strecher
2. When he regained conscious, ...
3. He saw his parents by his side as well as the passer-by that saved his life.
2.
CW feedback - Nadiah's writing
Nadiah - C 16 L 13 Total 29/40
Good writing but need to be more mindful in your tenses.
Good Vocab:
1. preparing for the worse
2. the worse was yet to come
3.my prayer was not answered
4. exclaimed in disbelief
5. in quick succession
6. not in a clear state of mind
Mistakes made:
1. How could passers-by just stood there...
2. Why don't they rush...
3. At the corner of my eyes,
4. Every one at the bus-stop were helding their breath.
5. He was laying sprawled on the floor.
6. How inconsiderate can they be?
7. He should not have drink.
Good writing but need to be more mindful in your tenses.
Good Vocab:
1. preparing for the worse
2. the worse was yet to come
3.my prayer was not answered
4. exclaimed in disbelief
5. in quick succession
6. not in a clear state of mind
Mistakes made:
1. How could passers-by just stood there...
2. Why don't they rush...
3. At the corner of my eyes,
4. Every one at the bus-stop were helding their breath.
5. He was laying sprawled on the floor.
6. How inconsiderate can they be?
7. He should not have drink.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Maths Practice 1 Results
Dear pupils
Remember to bring your Practice 1 Paper 1 to class tomorrow. Think through the questions and do the corrections before class. Be prepared to clarify any doubts. We only have 2 hours tomorrow and will be racing against time. Please come prepared.
Mdm Toh
1
ANG QI JIAN
99
2
WU JINGNI
96
3
KEE KAH LOK
95.5
4
LIM QIAN WEI
93
5
LOW SONG DA EMERSON
92
6
LOH XIAO QI
90
7
ONG WEI LONG
87
8
LI ZHIXIAN, RODRICK
86
9
PEI YAN BO
85
10
YU JING JIE
85
11
NAVETHIRA D/O RAVI CHANDRAN
83
12
ZACKIR HUSSAIN AJMAL ARSATH
83
13
CHIA YUN SHAN
82
14
NUR NAAZILAH BTE HIDAYATULLAH
81
15
TAN GUAN MIN
81
16
AW HWEE HEAN
80
17
NG YAN ZHEN
80
18
FONG WEI DENG
79
19
WOON WEE HAN, EUGENE
79
20
SIM WEI JIE, EDRICK
73
21
GOH JIA YING, CHRISTABEL
70
22
LIM XUE TING SHIRLEY
67
23
MUHAMMAD ASYRAF B ADAM
67
24
AO MINGYI, BELINDA
65
25
SEE JIA YI
64.5
26
HASZIRAH BTE GHANI
63
27
TRICIA LIM YUN QI
62
28
ELUMALAI VAISHNAPRIYA
61
29
SNG JIA HUI
56
Remember to bring your Practice 1 Paper 1 to class tomorrow. Think through the questions and do the corrections before class. Be prepared to clarify any doubts. We only have 2 hours tomorrow and will be racing against time. Please come prepared.
Mdm Toh
1
ANG QI JIAN
99
2
WU JINGNI
96
3
KEE KAH LOK
95.5
4
LIM QIAN WEI
93
5
LOW SONG DA EMERSON
92
6
LOH XIAO QI
90
7
ONG WEI LONG
87
8
LI ZHIXIAN, RODRICK
86
9
PEI YAN BO
85
10
YU JING JIE
85
11
NAVETHIRA D/O RAVI CHANDRAN
83
12
ZACKIR HUSSAIN AJMAL ARSATH
83
13
CHIA YUN SHAN
82
14
NUR NAAZILAH BTE HIDAYATULLAH
81
15
TAN GUAN MIN
81
16
AW HWEE HEAN
80
17
NG YAN ZHEN
80
18
FONG WEI DENG
79
19
WOON WEE HAN, EUGENE
79
20
SIM WEI JIE, EDRICK
73
21
GOH JIA YING, CHRISTABEL
70
22
LIM XUE TING SHIRLEY
67
23
MUHAMMAD ASYRAF B ADAM
67
24
AO MINGYI, BELINDA
65
25
SEE JIA YI
64.5
26
HASZIRAH BTE GHANI
63
27
TRICIA LIM YUN QI
62
28
ELUMALAI VAISHNAPRIYA
61
29
SNG JIA HUI
56
5 Maths questions a day (2)
1. There were 3/4 as many boys as girls at a birthday party. After 12 boys left the party and 8 more girls joined the party, there were 30 more girls than boys remaining at the party. Find the number of boys at the party at first. (5m)
2. Jon and Hakim saved $804 altogether. 1/5 of Jon’s savings was $48 less than 1/4 of Hakim’s savings. How much more did Hakim save than Jon? (5m)
3. A car and a van travelled from A to B. The car reached B in 2h but the van had only travelled 70% of the distance. The speed of the van was 30km/h slower than the car.
a) Find the distance between A and B. (3m)
b) Find the speed of the van in km/h. (2m)
4. Hanah, Ivan and Jieli had some stickers. The ratio of the number of stickers Hanah had to the number of stickers Jieli had was 5:7. The total number of stickers Hanah and Ivan had altogether was 3 times as many stickers as what Jieli had. Ivan and Jieli had 69 stickers altogether. How many stickers did Ivan have? (4m)
5. Ben, Dan, Mark and Imran had a sum of money. Ben had 3/8 of the amount that Dan had. Dan had 60% more money than Mark. Imran had 75% of the total amount of money the three boys had. If Imran spent 25% of his money, he would have $270 left. What was the original sum of money the four boys had? (4m)
2. Jon and Hakim saved $804 altogether. 1/5 of Jon’s savings was $48 less than 1/4 of Hakim’s savings. How much more did Hakim save than Jon? (5m)
3. A car and a van travelled from A to B. The car reached B in 2h but the van had only travelled 70% of the distance. The speed of the van was 30km/h slower than the car.
a) Find the distance between A and B. (3m)
b) Find the speed of the van in km/h. (2m)
4. Hanah, Ivan and Jieli had some stickers. The ratio of the number of stickers Hanah had to the number of stickers Jieli had was 5:7. The total number of stickers Hanah and Ivan had altogether was 3 times as many stickers as what Jieli had. Ivan and Jieli had 69 stickers altogether. How many stickers did Ivan have? (4m)
5. Ben, Dan, Mark and Imran had a sum of money. Ben had 3/8 of the amount that Dan had. Dan had 60% more money than Mark. Imran had 75% of the total amount of money the three boys had. If Imran spent 25% of his money, he would have $270 left. What was the original sum of money the four boys had? (4m)
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